Fear no nukes

Go Go

In the wake of the Japanese reactor hysteria it's comforting to know that all is not as apocalyptic as it may seem. In fact, it turns out that small doses of radiation are actually good for you—in Ann Coulter's world:

...the only good news is that anyone exposed to excess radiation from the nuclear power plants is now probably much less likely to get cancer.

This only seems counterintuitive because of media hysteria for the past 20 years trying to convince Americans that radiation at any dose is bad. There is, however, burgeoning evidence that excess radiation operates as a sort of cancer vaccine.

Pharyngula

"When Roger Ebert was a boy, doctors used the best medical technology of the day to treat his ear aches and tonsillitis--radiation. Decades later, the Chicago Sun-Times film critic developed thyroid cancer, and it's a good bet those X-ray treatments are to blame."

Cape Cod ENT


Here's the entire Japanese reactor situation explained in a five minute cartoon.

Update—here's an article by a Japanese Skeptic:

Just when you think they couldn't get any lower, leave it to the homeopaths to try to capitalize on a catastrophy. Their message is simple: "Don't worry about radiation, there's a pill for that."

 Swift


So what happens when you play around with more substantial amounts of radiation, like building your own breeder reactor in the shed out back? (picture from 2007):

Pease saw eleven men swarming across her carefully manicured lawn... Three of the men had donned ventilated moon suits and were proceeding to dismantle the potting shed with electric saws, stuffing the pieces of wood into large steel drums emblazoned with radioactive warning signs... What the men in the funny suits found was that the potting shed was dangerously irradiated and that the area’s 40,000 residents could be at risk.

Harper's


Meanwhile, it seems that once again string-theorist-turned-media-pundit Michio Kaku has weighed in a topic outside his area of expertise:

"I would personally advocate the Chernobyl option," Kaku said. "Do what Gorbachev did in 1986. Call out the Japanese air force, get the Japanese army to bring a fleet of helicopters armed with sand, boric acid and concrete and entomb this entire reactor. Bury it in concrete." 

Kaku may be a physicist at the City College of New York, but his specialty is string theory rather than nuclear engineering. So what do the engineers say?

"That certainly might turn out to be an option," Elmer Lewis, professor emeritus of mechanical engineering at Northwestern University, told me today. But burying the entire site this stage "would be very premature at this point."

Cosmicblog

I don't know about you but I've been losing respect for Kaku by the day lately:

"Here, for instance, is Michio Kaku simply babbling in reply to a question about evolution, and getting everything wrong. It's painful to watch. This guy isn't really an idiot, is he?"

Pharyngula (read the comments for more examples)

He needs to stick to futurism. That seems to be his best subject.

"In many articles on the Internet, the ritual of Agnihotra has been promoted as a simple ritual that helps to minimise the adverse impact of nuclear radiation. The statement peaked our interest, because for modern science this is a fantastic proposition: that a simple ritual done at sunrise and sunset along with the recitation of a mantra can actually quell the harmful effects of nuclear fallout. This ritual also becomes especially relevant with some other information we have received through spiritual research about the coming times.

Most people do not know that there are measures that can be taken at a spiritual level, along with efforts at a psychological and physical level to defend oneself against a nuclear attack. This article expands on the measures we can take at a spiritual level to protect ourselves from the effects of a nuclear attack and for the prevention of it occurring."

Hindu Janajagruti Samiti

Mutant

"Magic is effected [sic] by radiation...it could be that the use of nuclear weapons and reactors is an unnatural act, or it could be that radiation kills and pollutes lifeforms, thus warping the mana on the astral plane. Perhaps the reason outer space is one big mana warp is due to the presence of radiation as much as a lack of life...the numerous meltdowns of nuclear plants and failure of nuclear warheads to detonate is suspected by some to be a side-effect of the Awakening changing nuclear reactions in some way... 

The genetic aftermath of radiation and pollutants may result in a mutant critter, which may have paranatural powers; toxic critters, which will definately have paranatural powers (more than it started with), and toxic spirits. Peculiar to sites of radioactive waste and destruction are Toxic Spirits of the Flames; glowing humanoids of sickly light and radioctive might, summoned by toxic shamans."

Uncle Ancient's Guide To Nuclear Mojo

"Planning to build a bomb shelter? We are here to help. All of our underground bomb shelters are custom built on site for strength, which supersedes all precast and prefabricated bomb shelters. Our system is simple, after performing a site evaluation we then send our qualified crews to your site (NO LOCAL CONTRACTORS, WE ONLY USE OUR OWN CREWS) to begin site prep and excavation."

Disaster Bunkers


Or you could just buy an old nuclear missile silo (quite probably full of asbestos):

"This Atlas E site has 25 acres (more or less) and paved access. It has rural water, electrical and sewer system on site and ready for re-connection. The perimeter is enclosed with barbed wire fence. The Atlas E “coffin style” structure is the best missile site type for retrofit use. This site has 15,000 sq. ft of hardened underground floor space.

Price: $285,000. (price to increase when drained in spring 2011)"

20th Century Castles