Friday, March 29, 2013

Our Wacky World—3/29/2013

More innuendo against rats (will it never cease?):
"A faulty switchboard was blamed for the incident, and in the kind of explanation that doesn't exactly inspire confidence, TEPCO says a 15-cm (6-inch) dead rat found 'near' the switchboard may have been linked to the failure. The company says it will further investigate the dead animal and possibly-associated 'burn marks' on the switchboard."
The Register

Here's a wider view of the alleged rodent. 

It's official: Jesus will show up this September—assuming this isn't another hoax site. And Obama looks like Satan (or vice versa). Even worse, he has a food taster.

CIA analysts recall the day they had to prepare for Dick Cheney:
"That month, Vice President Cheney scheduled a meeting with our Branch to discuss our assessment of Iraq’s relationship with al-Qaida and 9/11. It was his second visit to the Branch; there always seemed to be more questions. The Branch Chief called us together for a practice session in a bland conference room a few days before their arrival. At this so-called 'murderboard' session, we weren’t stripping down our analysis to find data we’d missed. We were practicing how to defend our perspective when questioned by the Vice President of the United States."

You meant to say the Sixth Commandment, right?
"The corpse of Modester Gida (30), who was from Nyamweda area in Mhondoro under Headman Mashingaidzwa's kraal reportedly left mourners shell-shocked after the deceased woman's vagina mysteriously disappeared and was replaced with a penis... 'What happened here was so scary. It's true a male organ grew on my aunt's body. We don't know what kind of a disease it is but we believe it's an act of witchcraft'"
My Zimbabwe

"Hearing all this, I was less shocked than intrigued. As an anthropologist who studies the region, I was familiar with the problem of penis snatching."

"Johnson said in court Thursday that the trial will delve into the hip-hop music culture and the notion that a secret society called the Illuminati has control over the success of some performers. It was the belief that a sacrifice had to occur in order to join the Illuminati that allegedly incited El-Amin... Investigators recovered more than a pound of marijuana from the Athens Avenue well as literature dealing with the Illuminati and its alleged connection to the music industry."
Richmond Times-Dispatch

"This man is a time traveler, James from the Future. He says he does not know what year he has come back from, but it is after the New Age or whatever you call it has already occurred, that great Transformation in Consciousness that will be happening any day now. (Many people expected it to occur in 2012, but were disappointed.) James says he does not know why he was sent back, but he thinks it is to act as a historian to make better records about what was happening before the Transformation."
Bad UFOs

"The National Rifle Association came under fire late Thursday from members of a gun-control advocacy group in Newtown, Conn., after reports surfaced of Newtown residents receiving robocalls and pro-gun postcards from the NRA."
Huffington Post

"Fifty-six-year-old Robert A. Lyzenga, a former pastor at Sunrise Christian Reformed Church in Lafayette, was charged Thursday with five counts of child exploitation and five counts of voyeurism... At least one external hard drive was found to have numerous videos and still photos of juvenile and adult females taken in the church’s restroom."

Dispatches From The Culture Wars

"...people are really overreacting about this there just some kids having fun all they did was break a couple of milk jugs the worst damage was that they knocked some cans down and break a single light it may be annoying for the employees but it certainly does not need SEVERAL misdemeanors maybe one thats all"

"...a new utility sink is installed in the men's restroom outside the House chamber in the state Capitol in Nashville, Tenn. Legislative staffers and building administrators have sought to reassure some concerned lawmakers that the new sink was not installed as a special facility to support Muslim prayer rituals, but rather to make it easier for custodial staff to fill buckets and clean mops"

"...a federal jury in Alabama has found the president of the Republic for the United States of America guilty of a number of federal tax crimes."

Game over, man

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